Since I was born without a single romantic cell in my body, when I first discovered the No Kiss Blogfest (like, 20 minutes ago), I thought, awesome! A blogfest for the non-kissing-stuff!
...then I read the rules and kindof went... uhm, uh oh.
'Cause it's supposed to be all, y'know <blushes>, romantic and stuff... a scene that captures the not-quite-a-kiss-yet moment of tension.
So I've been looking. Oh my goodness, I have been looking through, like, every long and short story I have ever written and... and... I swear, I fail at being a girl. I almost never write romantic relationships, and when I do have something along those lines, the relationships are usually creepy, cruel, weird, obsessive, twisted or downright scary.*
The best I could come up with is a scene from Brake Fluid, Blood & Body Bags which is definitely not a story about finding romantic love...
There were a few I could have used from earlier in the story, but I didn't want to re-post something ('cause that's just boring), here's a scene I know no one has read yet. And to state clearly: this is only first-draft material.
EDIT: I'm swapping it out for a different scene. Sorry it's longer, but the other one wasn't technically an almost-kiss.
*And even though I have no hopes of ever writing a convincingly authentic romantic story on my own, Alcar, you are STILL forbidden from writing 'Simon's Oath' fan-fiction where Simon & Faith hook up in a sickeningly sweet, Disney-esque love-love relationship. Be warned: I know where you live...
Even if it wasn't romantic, I think this might be my fav No Kiss entry. It intriques me. Makes me want to read on.
ReplyDeleteHa! That guy behind the counter is a classic. Nicely done.
ReplyDeleteYou pulled me right into this place and made me care about these two and what they're into. And, ha, it is darkly romantic: "why would I breathe?" "my pulse is racing like I'm dodging cops"
ReplyDeletewell, done, thx
Yeah, that was an interesting excerpt that raises a lot of questions, including what gender the narrator is, and why the intense scrutiny for cameras at the gas stop on the way to find a fishing lake. ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing that with us.
Hey monkey,nice to meet you.
ReplyDeleteMost interesting scene I've read so far. Definitely would like to know more.
I'll be back.
Ha! Love "You're cute when you're slow."
ReplyDeleteNice scene! :)
I really enjoyed reading this! :-) Thanks for participating!
ReplyDeleteShe's smarter than she looks and I bet way tougher too. :D
ReplyDeleteThe more I see of this story the more I like it. It just intrigues me all around.
ReplyDeleteVery nice. I'm interested to read more. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteooh, i liked the darkness of this very much. Especially the "why would i breathe" line.
ReplyDeleteAnd to answer your question n my blog, they have been running around for a days, but! She has a spell that keeps her clean and smelling good. There's a bit of contention around it with the MC.
Nice job, picking up on it! Keeps me on my toes!
A lot of tension in this piece and, yes, some romance, too.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing it, that rebel, Olivia
Great job. That cashier is something else.
ReplyDeleteYour description is flawless. I love the cashier. Love!
ReplyDeleteI loved the fact that this wasn't a romantic almost kiss. Great job.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone for your comments, I've had fun reading through the other entries (think I'm about 6 or 7 from the end...)
ReplyDelete@ jaybird
Thanks! ...now I just need to finish the story ;)
@ Amalia T
...well, I think he smells pretty classic...
@ Tricia J O'Brian
Hahahah, dark is what I like to do best :)
@ kelworthfiles
Thank you for being curious about the gender of the MC and why he/she was looking for cameras. They're not out to fish... there's looking for a good place to dump a body... oh, teenagers, what trouble you get into...
@ farawayeyes
Nice to meet you too!
@ Larissa
...yep, that's about as romantic as I get. 'Cute'.
@ Frankie Diane Mallis
Well, thank you for hosting ;)
@ ralfast
Do you mean Triss? or do you mean the MC, who may or may not be female...
@ Charity Bradford
Well, if the Unicorn Bell site wasn't so fabulous, there wouldn't be as much of it online as there is, so thank you :)
@ Christine Danek
...and thank you for commenting!
@ Sarah Ahiers
Thanks for popping in and answering my question :) I always get picky when it comes to things like that :)
@ Olivia J Herrell
...I don't know if I'd classify it as romance... a weird sort of obsessive relationship, perhaps... but I'm glad you enjoyed it :)
@ Medeia Sharif
An interesting fellow, indeed. Better in text than in person, I'm sure, due to the smell thing...
@ RA Desilets
...I hear he's looking for a date... want his number? He might need a breath-mint though...
@ portrayaloftichwi
ReplyDelete...wow, I had to type that 4 times... did I spell it right?
Yeah, I kinda suck at the whole *romance* thing.
...dark obsession? jealously? for some reason that kinda thing is easier for me to write :)