Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Writing more 'Jay'

Yes! I'm actually writing again!

...it's been too long, and I do admit, it's coming slowly, but I'm about 5,200 words into Project #6.

Here's a taste of where I am and what this first draft is looking like. Please feel free to mock, or correct, any abysmal violations of grammar, or the English language in general. I'm sure there are many.


In this scene, Jay is referring to Aricia, his last girlfriend. Since they broke up, he hasn't painted at all until his interest was recently piqued by Kell and the unusual number of scars on her body. He's still pretty bitter about the breakup, since she dumped him before the painting was complete, which resulted in him only winning second place in a very important contest.



7 comments:

  1. I love it! Such beautiful language: "the blotted congestion of capillaries", "the raging insecurity under her polished smile"--beautiful! I love the way you write, Ms. Monkey, and I'm so glad you're at it again.

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    1. Thanks, Guilie, it feels good to be back at it :)

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  2. Your writing is so lyrical. The artist in you comes out.

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    1. Thanks, Sue :) Normally I hold back on the literary-descriptive-ness, but with an artist main character, I figured I could play away without limits, and always cut later when it goes 'too far' into the dangerous & slippery purple-prose zone ;)

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    2. the 'twilight sky' bit I already know will be pared back ;) It hit the 'too-far' line, but I left it in for now since it is just first draft, and it would be cheating to post edited work on here ;)

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  3. I love your writing! For some reason "the highways of veins and arteries" really sticks with me. Beautiful :)

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    1. Thanks :)

      ...though strangely, that was one of the descriptions I liked the least as it seemed too common :p

      I always think it's interesting how everyone has different tastes :)

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Type me out a line of Shakespeare or a line of nonsense. Dumb-blonde-jokes & Irish jokes will make me laugh myself silly :)